August 25, 2017

Thank you to everyone who stopped by the market pavilion on Monday to take a peek at the eclipse through special eclipse glasses! Team Fergmeijer greatly appreciated the ability to be nerdy in public.

Congratulations to Linda F who is celebrating a real milestone this week. Imagine the sheer amount of wisdom and dirty jokes one can accumulate by the time you hit 29! Happy birthday also goes out to Amy H and Diane L who turn 29 next week.

You know what’s odd? Every other number.

Next movie night at the Billings Library is tomorrow night (August 26). Get back to your bilingual roots with Bon Cop, Bad Cop 2 (rated 14A)! Admission is free, as always. The movie starts at 7pm.

Despite conspiracy theories that have been swirling, Team Fergmeijer is confident that the eclipse and the extreme, expedited erosion that put the beach slide out of commission are not connected. Although, we are less sure that the rise in the number of turkeys in town isn’t connected to the rise in bird puns in our column.

Speaking of birds, this week’s Turkey Trivia is brought to you by the KGB (Kagawong Gobble Brigade), who seem to have recently commandeered the Bavarian House. Did you know? “A male turkey is called a tom or a gobbler, a female is a hen, and a baby turkey a poult or chick. A young male turkey is called a jake and a young female is a jenny. A group of wild turkeys is called a flock, a group of domesticated turkeys is commonly referred to as a rafter.” The KGB also add that the rafters of turkeys seen around town are not delicious at all.

If you see MBB (aka Mike C) out and about, ask him about his new accessory he had installed recently. We wish him a speedy recovery!

Mimi O’Bonsawin is back playing live at the marina tonight! The show has a 7-ish start, and it is highly recommended that you bring your own chairs.

How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two - one to screw the bulb almost all the way in, and a second to give it a surprise twist at the end.

Save the date! Bark in the Park is back again this year on September 9. The fun starts at noon and runs until 2. This year’s theme is ‘Our rescued animals and local organizations who help.’ Bring your four-legged friends and sit, stay and play! And don’t forget, the Kagawong Canine Social Club meets every Sunday at 1pm.

Back to school is just around the corner. Team Fergmeijer has some advice for students looking ahead to September: Always wear glasses to math class - they help division. Have a great week!