October 30, 2024

We here at Team Fergmeijer have long thought that the title of our favourite newspaper was perhaps a bit too long and could use a short form. (If you thought we were going to make some joke here about the Sudbury Star needing a nickname, joke’s on you! We would never be that predictable.) Anyhoo…The Expositor is a bit of a mouthful for some, and a possible moniker was suggested to us by a good friend, and loyal reader who let us know that, when the ‘Spoz’ arrives on their doorstep, the first thing they read is this column (after the obituaries of course). We quite liked how that sounds and almost burst a button laughing when we heard it. If you have a pet name for the paper, drop us a line and let us know. 

We’ll give you pumpkin to talk about! Trick-or-treaters are invited to stop by the Park Centre on Halloween for treats, courtesy of the Billings Park, Recreation and Wellness Committee. And they can detour up the stairs to the library after to maximize their Kagawong candy collection! For those staying home to hand out the candy, be aware that some MSS students may be coming around to collect non-perishable food for their Halloween for Hunger campaign. The goods all go to support families in need on Manitoulin.

Remembrance Day is quickly approaching and the museum board’s newest initiative to honour veterans is finally up and out for all to see. The flags around Kagawong honouring local veterans look amazing and remind us of how far our local soldiers went when called by their country. 

MPP Mike Mantha will be holding constituency clinics at a variety of locations across Manitoulin next month. On Tuesday, November 12th you can book an appointment to offer your thoughts and ask your questions of our local representative at the Park Centre from 1 - 2pm. Contact the constituency office to make an appointment or for more information (1-800-831-1899 /  mmantha-co@ola.org )

You’ve heard of elf on the shelf, but have you heard of shop-past-dark in the Park (Centre)? Christmas in Kagawong is coming up on November 15th & 16th! Mark the date in your calendar and get ready to explore all the Kagawong Christmas market has to offer on those two days. Including the Anglican Church’s annual meat pie fundraiser. Pop into the church on the Saturday and dinner is taken care of, then browse the bake sale for dessert and the craft table and gift bags just to round out the trip. 

Mark your calendars and get your bidding hand ready: the Billings Library will be holding their annual online silent auction starting on Thursday November 21st. Last year’s auction had over 70 items up for bid and this year is shaping up to be just as impressive (if the load of gravel isn’t your thing, how about a load of mulch instead?). All bidding is done via facebook.com/groups/libraryauction and with nearly 400 participants, it is always a lively event. If you would like to donate an item or service to the auction, or would just like more information, drop a line to billingsreads@gmail.com.

We want wish happy 29th birthdays to Diane N, Connie F, and Gail L who are all completing another trip around the sun. Of course, ‘happy birthday’ might seem like a lot of pressure in this crazy world that keeps throwing one thing after another at us, so feel free just to have a birthday. No pressure. We won’t judge. 

Deep thought of the week: Do Tetley employees get coffee breaks? Have a great week!

October 23, 2024

October 23rd is International Mole Day. It wasn’t made clear to us if it was referring to the furry rodent variety or the industrial espionage variety, though. And there’s a small chance there was a typo and it is really international molé day. Maybe it’s meant to be a bit more niche - a day to celebrate saucy rodent spies (molé mole moles). Have fun, however you celebrate the day!

The next Youth Rangers event by Manitoulin Streams is coming up this Thursday from 5:30-7pm at the Kagawong Park Centre. Children in grades 1-8 are welcome to come and learn about the salmon of Manitoulin. Rumour has it there may also be some sweet treats! Cost is $5 per child. Contact getinvolved.manitoulinstreams@gmail.com for more information or to register.

Remembrance Day is quickly approaching and the museum board’s newest initiative to honour veterans is finally up and out for all to see. The flags honouring local veterans look amazing and remind us of how far our local soldiers went when called by their country. 

Not only does the village now have TWO new bridges, there is also a selection of new signage along the river trail. The signage is just like your favourite columnists - informative and visually appealing. 

MPP Mike Mantha will be holding constituency clinics at a variety of locations across Manitoulin next month. On Tuesday, November 12th you can book an appointment to offer your thoughts and ask your questions of our local representative at the Park Centre from 1 - 2pm. Contact the constituency office to make an appointment or for more information (1-800-831-1899 /  mmantha-co@ola.org )

You’ve heard of elf on the shelf, but have you heard of art in the Park (Centre)? Christmas in Kagawong is coming up on November 15th & 16th! Mark the date in your calendar and get ready to explore all the Kagawong Christmas market has to offer on those two days.

Lately, the autumn leaves are gorgeous enough to inspire even the least poetic among us to appreciate a good verse. In honour of the humble mangel ​​wurzel,we present an ode to possibly the greatest of the vegetable throwing events (superior even to frozen pea throwing, we hear): mangold hurling.

Each year when Autumn comes to pass
And tawny owls do hoot
We take ourselves out to the grass
To hurl our sacred root

The maids do come to hope and pray
They'll be the one who's chosen
By the champion hurler of this day
In smock or lederhosen

Mark your calendars and get your bidding hand ready: the Billings Library will be holding their annual online silent auction from Thursday November 21st to  Sunday November 24th. Last year’s auction had over 70 items up for bid and this year is shaping up to be just as impressive (can anyone say 10 round golf card?!). All bidding is done via facebook.com/groups/libraryauction and with nearly 400 participants, it is always a lively event. If you would like to donate an item or service to the auction, or would just like more information, drop a line to billingsreads@gmail.com.

Best wishes go out to Rachel B and Meranda V who have completed another trip around the sun this week. Few things in this world age really well: wine, cheese, whiskey, and quality antiques. Hmmm, kind of forgot what point we were making there. Anyway, Happy birthday!

And a very happy, quite belated birthday to Paula M. We are embarrassed to have missed such a big day for you. You’ve turned 29 in Billings Township for a lot of years, and now that you are living outside the township, who knows how old you could be turning!? We wouldn’t get too worked up about it though. It’s not like you are going to jump from turning 29 each year to suddenly turning 75 or anything. Despite the tardiness, we hope you accept our most heartfelt and best wishes!

One half of Team Fergmeijer was actually in the hospital getting a weird looking mole checked out last week. Turns out she could have just left it in the garden. Have a great week!

October 16, 2024

Our friend Alice had never seen the Northern Lights, so we were really excited to have her on the Island last week to see them. We’d been out on the shore for about 20 minutes when we noticed she didn’t seem very interested, so we had to ask her, “Do the Aurora boreyouAlice?”

Congratulations to the township on their new website! Head over to billingstwp.ca to see the glow up that has been done on the town's online hub. Check out the township’s latest monthly newsletter while you’re there, to keep on top of all the goings-on in Billings. 

Greetings, puzzle lovers. We come in pieces! This Saturday (October 19th) the Billings library is holding a fall puzzle swap. Come by the library on Upper Street from 10-1pm and trade in your used jigsaws for new-to-you puzzles. 

Time is almost up! Don’t miss your chance to vote on the name of the covered rink in Kagawong. Visit https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/HSDCSV9 to have your say. Voting will close Tuesday, October 22 at 12 noon.

The next Youth Rangers event by Manitoulin Streams is coming up on Thursday, October 24 from 5:30-7pm at the Kagawong Park Centre. Children in grades 1-8 are welcome to come and learn about the salmon of Manitoulin. Rumour has it there may also be some sweet treats! Cost is $5 per child. Contact getinvolved.manitoulinstreams@gmail.com for more information or to register.

You’ve heard of elf on the shelf, but have you heard of the lark in the Park (Centre)? Christmas in Kagawong is coming up on November 15th & 16th! Mark the date in your calendar and get ready to explore all the Kagawong Christmas market has to offer on those two days.

Mark your calendars and get your bidding hand ready: the Billings Library will be holding their annual online silent auction from Thursday November 21st to  Sunday November 24th. Last year’s auction had over 70 items up for bid and this year is shaping up to be just as impressive (can anyone say Ripley’s Aquarium tickets?!). All bidding is done via facebook.com/groups/libraryauction and with nearly 400 participants, it is always a lively event. If you would like to donate an item or service to the auction, or would just like more information, drop a line to billingsreads@gmail.com.

The Kagawong Gobble Brigade has been laying pretty low these days - understandable given the time of year we suppose, but we are still keeping an eye out for them just in case it ends up involving fowl play. 

Congratulations to Sophie Edwards on her new release, Conversations with the Kagawong River! Join Sophie for an author reading and book launch, Saturday November 30th from 3:30-6pm at Split Rail in Gore Bay. There will be a Q&A, book signing, live music, snacks, and more! 

Happy birthday wishes go out to Islanders Sue W and Ken F. Non-Islander Jef with one f is also celebrating his birthday. Jef, keep an eye out for the two gifts we sent you. We wrapped them in a weird, nubby fabric instead of smooth wrapping paper because even though we can’t be with you on your big day, we wanted you to feel our presents.

Did you know? You can catch up on all past Team Fergmeijer columns at http://teamfergmeijer.blogspot.com/. That’s right - all the punfoolery in one spot.

Did you know? The Aurora Borealis isn’t heavy at all. In fact, it’s pretty light. Have a great week!

October 9, 2024

Bet your autumn dollar, fall is one of our favourite seasons! It’s definitely in our top four. Fall is a great time to spruce things up around the house. We started by putting some mums out on our steps, then branched out to corn stalks. Next thing we know our houses are fully decked out with 8-foot tall inflatable pumpkins. Some might think they are silly seasonal decorations, but we say, gourd big or go home. 

Old Mill Road residents can finally take the direct route to the post office again. That’s right, the bridge work is complete and the bridge is open to traffic again! Although, for those walking, the slight detour through the river trail and across the pedestrian bridge is still a good option. 

Stock up for winter - the library is holding a fall puzzle swap on Saturday October 19th. Come by the Billings library from 10-1pm and trade in your used jigsaws for new-to-you puzzles. 

Happy birthday to Claire T who is celebrating her big day later this week. Always remember that the key to staying young is make-up. Make-up an age and stick with it!

Voting sure is a poll lot of fun! Don’t miss your chance to vote on the name of the covered rink in Kagawong. Visit https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/HSDCSV9 to have your say. Voting will close Tuesday, October 22 at 12 noon.

You’ve heard of elf on the shelf, but have you heard of the spender in the Park Centre? Christmas in Kagawong is coming up on November 15th & 16th! Mark the date in your calendar and get ready to explore all the Kagawong Christmas market has to offer on those two days.

Body Stories Dance is back at the Kagawong Park Centre this fall, with programming for dance enthusiasts of all ages and abilities. Check out their website at https://www.bodystoriesdance.com/schedule for class times and fees.

Mark your calendars and get your bidding hand ready: the Billings Library will be holding their annual online silent auction from Thursday November 21st to  Sunday November 24th. Last year’s auction had over 70 items up for bid and this year is shaping up to be just as impressive (can anyone say Ripley’s Aquarium tickets?!). All bidding is done via facebook.com/groups/libraryauction and with nearly 400 participants, it is always a lively event. If you would like to donate an item or service to the auction, or would just like more information, drop a line to billingsreads@gmail.com.

Do you have a friend or family member you would like to honour (or embarrass) with a mention in the column? Birthday coming up? Anniversary? Birth announcement? Matched every single sock to its correct partner on laundry day? Reach out to fergmeijer@gmail.com and we will make sure they feel extra special. 

Did you know? You can catch up on all past Team Fergmeijer columns at http://teamfergmeijer.blogspot.com/. That’s right - all the punfoolery in one spot.

Not to get sappy on you or anything (Team Fergmeijer isn’t normally acorny bunch), but we appreciate how poplar our readers make us feel. Have a great week!

October 2, 2024

It is ofishally salmon run season in Kagawong! Please don’t harass them or give them any carp as they are working hard to head upstream. We aren’t just moaning and whaling for the halibut with no porpoise. If their return trip upriver is made too difficult, the whole process for spawning a new generation will flounder. As they reach the end of their lives, the returning salmon can definitely use more friends than anemones. 

At time of writing, the township burn ban has been lifted. Better to be safe than sorry - for the most updated status, check out the township website at billingstwp.ca.

We know there is no use crying over spilled brine, but Team Fergmeijer was a little disappointed that our suggestion to name the covered rink the “Township of Dillings PickleDome” didn’t make the shortlist of potential names. With the announcement of the top four names, voting is now open! Visit https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/HSDCSV9 to have your say. Voting will close Tuesday, October 22 at 12noon.

Body Stories Dance is back at the Kagawong Park Centre this fall, with programming for dance enthusiasts of all ages and abilities. Check out their website at https://www.bodystoriesdance.com/schedule for class times and fees.

Mark your calendars and get your bidding hand ready: the Billings Library will be holding their annual online silent auction from Thursday November 21st to  Sunday November 24th. Last year’s auction had over 70 items up for bid and this year is shaping up to be just as impressive (can anyone say Ripley’s Aquarium tickets?!). All bidding is done via facebook.com/groups/libraryauction and with nearly 400 participants, it is always a lively event. If you would like to donate an item or service to the auction, or would just like more information, drop a line to billingsreads@gmail.com.

They say good things come in threes, but we at Team Fergmeijer are more inclined to find groups of four superior. Many good things come in fours: Ninja Turtles, the Golden Girls, the A-Team, the Ghostbusters, the Fantastic Four, ghosts in PacMan, horsemen of the apocalypse (okay, maybe we should have stopped while we were ahead). We would like to wish many happy returns to a fantastic foursome of Kagawongians: Keith, Kim, Dennis and Jamie

Do you have a friend or family member you would like to honour (or embarrass) with a mention in the column? Birthday coming up? Anniversary? Birth announcement? Matched every single sock to its correct partner on laundry day? Reach out to fergmeijer@gmail.com and we will make sure they feel extra special. 

Did you know? You can catch up on all past Team Fergmeijer columns at http://teamfergmeijer.blogspot.com/. That’s right - all the punfoolery in one spot.

Did you know that you can take your basic, everyday caramel popcorn, add some homemade maple syrup and nuts, and you will have some delicious and sappy poppycock? You’re welcome! Have a great week!