September 25, 2024

For those of you new to the column, you might not realize that here at Team Fergmeijer, we pride ourselves on subtly inserting the odd bit of wordplay. The casual reader might be completely pun-aware of it, but the savvy reader is not punfamiliar with the odd quip or bon mot we sprinkle into the column (judiciously applied, of course). Even if at first you don’t really appreciate our humour, at some point you will pun-doubtably realize our punchant for wordplay has groan on you. Then, before you know it, the column isn’t a source of pun-ishment, but rather a pundle of joy you look forward to each week. 

At time of writing, Billings Township is back in a partial burn ban. Campfires and fireworks are still allowed, but other fires are banned. Check the township website for the most up-to-date information.

We don’t know about you, but for us, last weekend was fully booked! Thank you to everyone who took part in the many events that were part of NorthWords and 4e’s Elemental Festival this weekend.  

Not ones to sit idle, now that the festival of words has come to a close, the library board is pleased to announce the dates of this year’s silent auction: Thursday November 21st - Sunday November 24th. Last year’s auction had over 70 items up for bid. This year is shaping up to be just as impressive (can anyone say Ripley’s Aquarium tickets?!). All bidding is done via facebook.com/groups/libraryauction and with nearly 400 participants, it is always a lively event. If you would like to donate an item or service to the auction, or would just like more information, drop a line to billingsreads@gmail.com

Do you have a friend or family member you would like to honour (or embarrass) with a mention in the column? Birthday coming up? Anniversary? Birth announcement? 6 days chocolate free? Adopted a new chinchilla? Reach out to fergmeijer@gmail.com and we will make sure they feel extra special. 

Did you know? You can catch up on all past Team Fergmeijer columns at http://teamfergmeijer.blogspot.com/. That’s right - all the punfoolery in one spot.

Never blame others for the road you are on. It’s your own asphalt. Have a great week!

September 18, 2024

Sometimes even notable luminaries like yours truly can start to feel overwhelmed with all the stuff coming at us in the modern world. We find the big issue with stuff is that so much of it happens so often. And don’t even get us started on things. Seriously, history is just one thing after another. Of course, some people will claim it is issues and sometimes even events that are the things you should be worried about. As well, there’s a whole school of thought that it’s really just the circumstances that you have to watch out for. And just when you think you have a handle on all of that, poof! Up pops a decision. It’s a lot. 

Flutter on into Kagawong this weekend for NorthWords and 4e’s Elemental Festival - there is fun for the whole family! Friday has workshops in the afternoon for adults and kids, and in the evening the popular ‘Book & Brew’ is back at Split Rail brewery in Gore Bay. Enjoy live music, complimentary snacks, purchase a drink (including non-alcoholic options), and get up close and personal with featured authors Coltrane Seesequasis, Mike Strobel, and poet Vera Constantineau. Book & Brew tickets are $15 per person and can be purchased at Billings Library or at the door. 

Carol Pasternak, the “Monarch Crusader”, is this year’s festival keynote speaker (Saturday 1pm). She has authored multiple books on the iconic local pollinators. Saturday also has workshops galore with family-friendly sessions in the morning (including children’s author Sahar Golshan), and author-led writing workshops for adults in the afternoon. Saturday evening, come out to experience Melody Johnson’s dramatic reading of her fantastic show, “Person of Interest” (admission by donation). Check out the festival ad in this edition of the Expositor for full details of all events, as well as online (Fb.com/NorthWordsFest  &  Fb.com/4eelementalfestival), or you can email NorthWordsFest@gmail.com for more information. Pre-registration for workshops is recommended but not required. 

The library has officially returned to its regular ‘winter’ hours (Tues & Thurs 4-7pm; Sat 10-1pm). The landfill continues with its summer hours until the end of October (Tues & Thurs 2-6pm; Sat & Sun 10am-4pm).

Big congratulations go out to Billings’ own Sophie Anne Edwards, whose soon-to-be published book, “Conversations With the Kagawong River” is on the CBC list of most anticipated poetry collections! Well done, and we can’t wait to pick up a copy in October!

Do you have a friend or family member you would like to honour (or embarrass) with a mention in the column? Birthday coming up? Anniversary? Birth announcement? New power tool to celebrate? Got out of the grocery store with only the things on their list? Reach out to fergmeijer@gmail.com and we will make sure they feel extra special. 

Did you know? You can catch up on all past Team Fergmeijer columns at http://teamfergmeijer.blogspot.com/. That’s right - all the punfoolery in one spot.

A wise person once said, laugh and the whole world laughs with you. Here at Team Fergmeijer, we tend to go with something like, cackle like a mad swamp witch and people back away slowly. Either way, have a great week!

September 11, 2024

Set phasers to pun! September 8th was Star Trek Day and Team Fergmeijer can’t help but reverse polarity and celebrate. We know the puns are a bit out there this week, but what can we say, we have a one Trek mind. When it comes to puns, we’ve always been of the enterprising sort. We do have to be careful though that our spicier puns don’t get us into any tribble.

A very happy birthday goes out to Jamie W and Kim B, both of whom are turning 29. Don’t think you are fooling anyone when you are talking about getting lit on your birthday. Everyone knows you are just referring to the cake. 

A belated bon voyage to Mike as he heads to the land of the badger to pursue his education. The town is a little less wormy without you.

Team Fergmeijer would like to send heartfelt get-well-soon wishes to Kagawongians Sadie and Cali. We know you’ll both be up to your usual shenanigans in no time.

TONIGHT! Come by the Kagawong Park Centre Wednesday, September 11 at 8pm for a concert by Juno-nominated Canadian Chamber Choir, featuring Sherryl Sewepagaham. This special concert is part of the choir’s Where Waters Meet CD release tour, and will feature 20 professional singers from across the country. Tickets are $30 and are available at the door. Don’t miss this incredible performance!

The Wednesday Kagawong markets may be done for the year, but the next evening market is right around the corner! Saturday, September 14th, come on out to the covered rink in Kagawong from 3:30pm to 8:30pm to check out the amazing vendors and support local!

Flutter on into Kagawong Friday, September 20th and Saturday, September 21st - NorthWords and 4e’s Elemental Festival are partnering to bring an amazing weekend of fun for the whole family! Friday starts with workshops in the afternoon for adults and kids, and in the evening the popular ‘Book & Brew’ is back at Split Rail brewery in Gore Bay. Enjoy live music, complimentary snacks, purchase a drink (including non-alcoholic options), and get up close and personal with featured authors Coltrane Seesequasis, Mike Strobel, and poet Vera Constantineau. Book & Brew tickets are $15 per person and can be purchased at Billings Library or at the door. 

Carol Pasternak, the “Monarch Crusader”, is this year’s festival keynote speaker (Saturday 1pm). She has authored multiple books on the iconic local pollinators. Saturday also has workshops galore with family-friendly sessions in the morning (including children’s author Sahar Golshan), and author-led writing workshops for adults in the afternoon. Saturday evening, come out to experience Melody Johnson’s dramatic reading of her fantastic show, “Person of Interest” (admission by donation). Check out the festival ad in this edition of the Expositor for full details of all events, as well as online (Fb.com/NorthWordsFest  &  Fb.com/4eelementalfestival), or you can email NorthWordsFest@gmail.com for more information. Pre-registration for workshops is recommended. 

The library has officially returned to its regular ‘winter’ hours (Tues & Thurs 4-7pm; Sat 10-1pm). The landfill continues with its summer hours until the end of October (Tues & Thurs 2-6pm; Sat & Sun 10am-4pm).

Ever wonder why Star Trek was so successful? We think it was because it had good Genes. Have a great week!

September 4, 2024

Yours truly adore the summer months (suns out, puns out as far as we are concerned), but September holds a special place in our hearts, too. The excitement of back to school (for kids AND for parents) is in the air, though it can be intimidating for some. Just remember to keep an ion the chemistry teacher, but the geometry teacher usually has acute sense of humour. All joking aside, drivers are reminded to watch for little ones getting on and off buses around the Island this week.

We want to wish a hearty happy birthday to Diane L and to our Manitoulin Mom who both turned 29 recently. These Kagawong stalwarts aren’t getting older; like any good antique, they are just increasing in value!

Pinkies up! The Township of Billings is hosting a Senior’s Tea, Friday September 6th, at 10am at the Park Centre. Stop in and share ideas for senior-focused events and activities in the community. 

NorthWords and 4e’s Elemental Festival are partnering to bring an amazing weekend of fun for the whole family! Friday, September 20th starts with workshops in the afternoon for adults and kids, and in the evening is the popular ‘Book & Brew’ at SplitRail brewery. Enjoy complimentary small bites, purchase a drink (including non-alcoholic options), and get up close and personal with featured authors Coltrane Seesequasis, Mike Strobel, and returning favourite, poet Vera Constantineau. Tickets are $15 per person and can be purchased at Billings Library or at the door. 

Carol Pasternak, the “Monarch Crusader”, is this year’s keynote speaker (Saturday 1pm). She has authored multiple books on the iconic local pollinators. Saturday also has workshops galore with family-friendly sessions in the morning (including children’s author Sahar Golshan), and author-led writing workshops for adults in the afternoon. Saturday evening come out to experience Melody Johnson’s dramatic reading of her fantastic show, “Person of Interest” (admission by donation). Check out the festival ad in this edition of the Expositor for full details of all events, as well as online (Fb.com/NorthWordsFest  &  Fb.com/4eelementalfestival), or you can email NorthWordsFest@gmail.com for more information. Pre-registration for workshops is recommended. 

The Manitoulin Tennis Club would like to thank everyone who came out for the end-of-the-summer tennis tournament last Saturday. Drop-in tennis continues 6pm on Wednesdays and 10am on Sundays at the Manitoulin Secondary School courts. All are welcome!

The new bridge span rolled through the village this past week, and rumour has it the new bridge will be completed by the end of September. We’re not sure yet just how smooth or bumpy it will be when finished. We’ll just have to cross that bridge when we get to it. 

Today is your last chance to explore Kagawong’s Wednesday market! Browse vendors galore and pick up a little something special at the rink and surrounding area from 10am until 3pm. 

The township has posted an Administrative Assistant – Finance position and is accepting resumes via e-mail or snail mail to Véronique Dion, CAO/Clerk Township of Billings 15 Old Mill Road, Kagawong ON P0P 1J0 or cao@billingstwp.ca until 12:00 pm. Friday, September 6th is the deadline for applications. Get full details on the township Facebook or web page.

The library has officially returned to its regular ‘winter’ hours (Tues & Thurs 4-7pm; Sat 10-1pm). The board would like to thank summer librarian Rock for the fantastic job they did again this year and wish them good luck at school this fall!

Team Fergmeijer’s back to school advice is: the best way to get straight As is with a ruler. Have a great week!