August 16, 2019

Summer is a great time to get through that pile of books you’ve been meaning to read all year. If you need some suggestions, don’t forget to pop in to see Emily at the library. She’ll get you set up. Team Fergmeijer just read the entire book of Genesis. To be honest, it was a bit of a disappointment. Not a single mention of Phil Collins. 

As of the writing of this column, the main beach at Kagawong is closed for swimming due to exceeding acceptable bacteriological water quality standards. Please obey the posted signs at the beach - they will be removed when it is safe for swimming again.

Happy 29th birthday to Bonnie F. Does anyone know if this is the point at which you are told to slow down by your doctor instead of by the police? 

We were given a beehive as a gift last week. We went to the store and asked for a dozen bees to put in it. The shopkeeper counted out thirteen bees and gave them to us. We told him that he’d given us one too many. He said, “One’s a freebie.”

One of Kagawong’s favourite authors, Bonnie Kogos, has published a new book: “The Boat that Brings You Home.” She will host a book party at the Kagawong Park Centre on Sunday, August 18 - be sure to stop in and pick up a copy!

Mark it on your calendar - the Elemental Festival is back with a fabulous lineup of entertainers for the fall of 2019! Musicians Sean Ashby, Ansley Simpson and local favourite, Fagroongala will be performing over the weekend of September 26th-30th. Rumour has it some local musicians will be performing as well! For more information and ticket information go online to www.4elementslivingarts.org

According to Greek mythology, Chiron was half horse, half human doctor. He was the centaur for disease control. We assume he was a strong supporter of herd immunization for keeping the population in stable condition. 

Only a few more weeks to get your farm veggies, fresh baking, local goods, and beautiful crafts at the Kagawong market this summer! Be sure to stop by the Market Pavillion Wednesdays from 10am - 3pm to check out the wares, and even pick up a BBQ lunch! You never know what you are going to find at the market. This past Wednesday, lucky shoppers got the chance to enjoy wild blueberry sundaes AND support the Angel Bus initiative at the same time!

Lord Mayor Ian Anderson met and surpassed all possible expectations of the lively crowd that gathered to celebrate the ‘crowning’ of Mary Buie as Billings Township’s 2019 Citizen of the Year. There were laughs, shared stories and cake galore! Congratulations Mary - it’s a well-earned award!

The next Euchre tournament is Wednesday, August 21, 7:30pm at the Kagawong Park Centre. Everyone welcome!

Don’t forget about baseball every Sunday at 7pm in Ice Lake. Bring a glove and a competitive nature!

A friend of Team Fergmeijer was telling us that her significant other bought her flowers, but they were a little rough looking. When she mentioned it to him, he said they were Dahlias. She showed us a picture of them. We’re not surprised Dahlia didn’t want them either. Have a great week!

August 9, 2019

It’s August! Which means the dog days of summer are upon us. Speaking of, a friend told us that he threw a ball from the top of Graham’s hill all the way to the Old Mill and his dog chased it down and brought it back to him. He swore it was the truth, but it sounds a bit far fetched to us.

Happy 29th birthdays go out to Lisa H and Meg M. Both are incredible women and we wanted to send something awesome to you on your birthday. Unfortunately, Mike at the post office said that it didn’t matter how many stamps we stuck on our faces, he still couldn’t send us through regular mail. (And who has the money for express post?!) Since we are talking birthdays, it just so happens that this is Team Fergmeijer’s FOURTH COLUMN-VERSARY! Thanks to all our readers (and newspaper editorial staff) who have put up with our nonsense week after week for four long years!

The Heritage Centre hosted their annual History Day in Kagawong on Thursday and it was another huge success! Many of the attendees also made their way down to the Blueberry social in support of the Angel Bus. Thank you to all the supporters of both organizations. 

Have you seen that new movie with the Dachshund in it? Apparently it’s an Oscar weiner. 

An annual gathering of a different sort occurred two weeks ago when the annual migration of Buies took place. Jen, Neil and Rob, along with their assorted spouses and children descended on the Island for a week of visiting, fun and frolic with family and friends.  Buies, Lawrences, Cichons, Fergusons, Coomes, Dekuypers, Kings, and Wards, oh my!

What do you call a magician dog? A labracadabrador.

If you’ve been wandering around downtown, you may have noticed the newest addition to the game pad area. New (regular sized) chessboards were installed with seating for the competitors. Super geeky fun for all!

We want to extend our sympathies to the family of Evie Bailey, who passed away this week. She was a pretty constant figure in the lives of a lot of people over the years in Billings and left an impression on everyone she met. 

One of Kagawong’s favourite authors, Bonnie Kogos, has published a new book: “The Boat that Brings You Home.” She will host a book party at the Kagawong Park Centre on Sunday, August 18 - be sure to stop in and pick up a copy!

Some of these dog puns are pretty bad, we know, but we’re trying not to terrier selves up about it. We’ve decided that a life without puns is ruff. 

Mark it on your calendar - the Elemental Festival is back with a fabulous lineup of entertainers for the fall of 2019! Musicians Sean Ashby, Ansley Simpson and local favourite, Fagroongala will be performing over the weekend of September 26th-30th. Rumour has it some local musicians will be performing as well! For more information and ticket information go online to www.4elementslivingarts.org

On Sunday, August 11th, join in the celebrations at the Kagawong Park Centre to acknowledge Mary Buie as Billings Township’s 2019 Citizen of the Year. From 2:00pm to 5:00pm, cake and refreshments will be served; guests are asked to bring a non-perishable item for the local food bank. Congratulations, Mary!

If a dog gives birth on the side of the road, could she be charged with littering?

The next Euchre tournament is Wednesday, August 21, 7:30pm at the Kagawong Park Centre. Everyone welcome!

We’re running out of ideas for dog puns; contact us at www.kagawong@live.ca if you have any pointers. Have a great week!

August 2, 2019

Ah, the hot and hazy days of summer. Team Fergmeijer was enjoying a leisurely lunch at Riverside on the weekend and were playing with the ketchup bottle when it squirted right in our eyes. In Heinz sight, goofing around like that was probably a bad idea. At the table next to us, a guy handed this girl a bottle of tonic water and ask her out on a date. He totally schwepped her off her feet. 

Happy birthdays go out to several people this week. MBB celebrated his 29th out of town but still managed to have a bang up day. Beth Gordon also turned 29 this week. Last year she told us she got heartburn from her birthday cake. This year we told her she should maybe remove the candles first.  ; Emma R is celebrating her 9th year while she’s in town for the month. If she keeps growing up at this rate, she’ll be 29 in no time!

History Day in Kagawong is fast approaching! Mark Thursday, August 8th on your calendar, and be sure to join staff from the Museum for one of two talks on The Shipwrecks of Georgian Bay and Harbor Island (3:30pm and 7:30pm) at the Park Centre. In between the talks, from 4pm-7pm, get your blue lips on by partaking in the Blueberry Social at the market pavillion! Featuring live music by Paul Best, all proceeds from the social go toward the Angel Bus. See you there! You can also support the Angel Bus by purchasing a ticket for the quilt raffle. Tickets are sold each week at the farmers market in Kagawong.

Some friends of ours just had a daughter, and named her JuneJulyAugust. We call her Summer for short.

On Sunday, August 11th, join in the celebrations at the Kagawong Park Centre to acknowledge Mary Buie as Billings Township’s 2019 Citizen of the Year. From 2:00pm to 5:00pm, cake and refreshments will be served; guests are asked to bring a non-perishable item for the local food bank. Congratulations, Mary!

The results are in from the last Euchre tournament (July 17th)! High score Karen & Myra; 2nd/3rd tie Ted & Ruth and Elva & Doris; Most lone hands Karen & Myra; Low Score Cal & Lilly; Special prize Corey. The next Euchre tournament is Wednesday, August 21, 7:30pm at the Kagawong Park Centre. Everyone welcome!

We’ve heard there’s a new church that’s formed on the Island. They serve cheese after every service. They’re fonduementalists. 

Batter’s up! Every Sunday at 7pm, join other ball players at the Ice Lake ball field for a game. No experience necessary, come out for some fun competition.

There’s never a dull moment over on Whiskey Lane. Rumour has it the Hruby clan (and friends) nearly pulled a Gilligan’s Island out in the bay. Left adrift after some engine trouble, they crafted a radio from some coconuts (as well as matching his and hers bikinis) and managed to raise the Hunt boys just before they left for their weekly picnic out in the Benjamins. Former mayor Aus Hunt, continuing with a life of service, even in his retirement, headed up the rescue efforts ensuring everyone got back to dry land safely. 

Did you see the tall ships that were docked at the marina on the weekend? They reminded us of a fun marine fact we recently learned: Do you know that Norway’s navy fleet have barcodes on the sides of them? It’s so that when the ships return to port, they can Scandinavian. Have a great week!

July 26, 2019

Aahh, summer! The time of year that Team Fergmeijer is happier than a seagull with a french fry. We have found ourselves firmly set in our summer routine: Eat, Beach, Sleep, Repeat. But fear not - if you have any events you would like mentioned here, you can still reach us at kagawong@live.ca. 

Please note that because the current water demand is overtaxing the municipal water system, the township has issued the following public notice regarding exterior water usage: Residents may use municipal water for exterior purposes (watering lawns and gardens, washing vehicles, etc.) only on alternating days. Those with even numbered residences on even numbered days, and odd numbered residences on odd numbered days. Exterior water usage may occur between 5am and 8am, and 6pm and midnight only. 

Team Fergmeijer’s secret for how to get a beach body: Step one - go to the beach. Step two - done.

Holy cow! We missed some birthdays last week because we got so caught up in puns of the bovine variety. Happy belated birthday to a pair of Theijsmeijer gents last Sunday - one turned 29, and the other 15. Hope you had a great day! Celebrating this week is Jen C (formerly Jen B). She currently lives in Alberta, but returns to the Island every year for her birthday to ensure she never turns more than 29. 

One of the best parts of living on Manitoulin is the low crime rates, though we heard about a man who came home one day last week and discovered someone had broken in and stolen every lamp in his house. He was completely delighted. 

Summerfest and the art tour drew a large crowd to town last weekend. Mary Buie led a small but mighty parade of decorated bikes and ugly hats, and Bella the clown had kids laughing and dancing. No word has been passed to Team Fergmeijer regarding the winner of the scavenger hunt, but when we know, you will know! 

As for the art tour, it was great to see a few new studios open for business - there are now even more reasons to visit Kagawong!

Batter’s up! Every Sunday at 7pm, join other ball players at the Ice Lake ball field for a game. Everyone welcome.

History Day in Kagawong is fast approaching! Mark Thursday, August 8th on your calendar, and be sure to join staff from the Museum for one of two talks on The Shipwrecks of Georgian Bay and Harbor Island (3:30pm and 7:30pm) at the Park Centre. In between the talks, from 4pm-7pm, get your blue lips on by partaking in the Blueberry Social at the market pavillion! Featuring live music by Paul Best, all proceeds from the social go toward the Angel Bus. See you there!

Mike at the post office told us he is heading to Spain next week. We were so excited for him. We asked if he was going to Parcelona. He just ignored what we consider to be an amazing pun. Of course, we may have told it wrong. After all, the key to a good mailman joke is in the delivery. Have a great week!

July 19, 2019

Cowabunga! There were several unusual encownters in town last week on Udder… er, Upper Street and Rainbow Heights. Some were more amoosing than others, but as far as we know, there were no cowsualties. Rumour has it council is putting together a steering committee to investigate beefing up security around town so that, mooving forward, incidents like that don’t happen again. 

Please note that because the current water demand is overtaxing the moonicipal water system, the township has issued the following public notice regarding exterior water usage: Residents may use moonicipal water for exterior purposes (watering lawns and gardens, washing vehicles, etc.) only on alternating days. Those with even numbered residences on even numbered days, and odd numbered residences on odd numbered days. Exterior water usage may occur between 5am and 8am, and 6pm and midnight only. 

Have you herd? As we predicted, this year’s annual book and bake sale was a legendairy success! Chairperson Ruth and librarian Jill asked us to express their appreciation to all the volunteers (special shout out to the Friends of Billings Library!) who make the sale possible each year. 

Did you feel a special aura mooving in the air this weekend? This past Saturday, a variety of vendors, practitioners and artists for came to town for a day of fun and frolic as part of the Enchanted Forest Mystical Fair. There’s never a dull moment in Kagawong!

TONIGHT! The summer fun continues with another beach moovie, sponsored by the Billings Public Library! Brave the waters of Mudge Bay at the main beach (or stay high and dry with us chickens, well away from the shore) while watching The Meg on the library’s giant outdoor screen. Start time is 9pm. Come early to stock up on snacks from the concession stand. NOTE: If the weather doesn’t cooperate, the movie will run Saturday night. If the weather still doesn’t clear up, the rain date is Friday, July 26th.

Summerfest continues tomorrow (Saturday, July 20th) with more fun than you can shake a paddle at! Beginning at 10am, come check out a special vendors’ market, village scavenger hunt, Artists on Main, face painting, BBQ lunch (sponsored by the Old Mill Heritage Centre), pop-up info booths, a kids-decorated bike parade, volunteer firefighters’ demoo & boot drive, a funky hat contest, a family-friendly obstacle course, the Cooking with Bella dance-off… and more! Come on out and celebrate our amazing commoonity spirit. Brought to you by members of the Economic Development Committee, and the Parks, Recreation, and Wellness Committee. 

One person’s junk is another person’s treasure! Do you have gently used clothing, books, household appliances or furniture you are looking to get rid of? During the Saturday of Summerfest (10am-3pm), bring your junk to sell, swap or give away! Park your vehicle, open the trunk or hatch, and you’re good to go! Watch for the signs along Old Mill Road. 

As usual, the Sunday following Summerfest (Sunday, July 21) is the annual Blessing of the Boats marine service at St. John the Evangelist Anglican Church. Service begins at 9am. Everyone welcome.

Fun fact: The leather from one cow hide yields 12 baseball gloves. Every Sunday at 7pm, join other ball players at the Ice Lake ball field for a game. Everyone welcome! 

History Day in Kagawong is fast approaching! Mark Thursday, August 8th on your calendar, and be sure to join staff from the Mooseum for one of two talks on The Shipwrecks of Georgian Bay and Harbor Island (3:30pm and 7:30pm) at the Park Centre. In between the talks, from 4pm-7pm, get your blue lips on by partaking in the Blueberry Social at the market pavillion! Featuring live music by Paul Best, all proceeds from the social go toward the Angel Bus. See you there!

Had you heard most of these cow puns before? It might be deja-moo. Have a great week!

July 12, 2019

Breaking news! The first Paikin sighting of the year was made by a (slightly hysterical) fan outside the Sugar Bush Canadian Coffee Company. Said fan nearly fell into a fit of the vapours upon realizing who was walking towards them across the parking lot. We felt their reaction was a bit over the top. Team Fergmeijer considers themselves to be big Steve Paikin fans, but we would never *cough cough* act so juvenile *ahem* and star struck… yeah, we don’t believe us either. We totally fangirl all over the place when our paths cross with Mr. Paikin. Welcome back to Kagawong, sir!

St. John’s Anglican Church would like to thank all the volunteers who helped out with the sale, and all the shoppers who came out to find that special treasure on Saturday. The sale was a spectacular success! 

This year’s annual book and bake sale was a huge success! If you ignore the brawl over the last double chocolate brownies at the baking table. And the shouting match that began as a friendly discussion over whether or not Hermione and Harry should have gotten together. Don’t even get us started on the hair pulling that broke out after one browser was overheard to say, ‘The movie was so much better than the book.” To be fair, we write this column early in the week, so we have no idea what happened. We assume that the efforts of all the volunteers, including the amazing Friends of Billings Library (aka FOBL), have paid off in spades. Thanks to all who came out in support of the library!

The summer fun continues next weekend with another beach movie, sponsored by the Billings Public Library! Friday, July 19th, brave the waters of Mudge Bay at the main beach (or stay high and dry with us chickens, well away from the shore) while watching The Meg on the library’s giant outdoor screen. Start time is 9pm. Come early to stock up on snacks from the concession stand. 

Summerfest continues on Saturday, July 20th with more fun than you can shake a paddle at! Beginning at 10am, come check out a special vendors’ market, village scavenger hunt, Artists on Main, face painting, BBQ lunch (sponsored by the Old Mill Heritage Centre), pop-up info booths, a kids-decorated bike parade, volunteer firefighters’ demo & boot drive, a funky hat contest, a family-friendly obstacle course, the Cooking with Bella dance-off… and more! Come on out and celebrate our amazing community spirit. Brought to you by members of the Economic Development Committee, and the Parks, Recreation, and Wellness Committee.

One person’s junk is another person’s treasure! Do you have gently used clothing, books, household appliances or furniture you are looking to get rid of? During the Saturday of Summerfest (10am-3pm), bring your junk to sell, swap or give away! Park your vehicle, open the trunk or hatch, and you’re good to go! Watch for the signs along Old Mill Road. 

As usual, the Sunday following Summerfest (Sunday, July 21) is the annual Blessing of the Boats marine service at St. John the Evangelist Anglican Church. Service begins at 9am. Everyone welcome.

Please note that because the current water demand is overtaxing the municipal water system, the township has issued the following public notice regarding exterior water usage: Residents may use municipal water for exterior purposes (watering lawns and gardens, washing vehicles, etc.) only on alternating days. Those with even numbered residences on even numbered days, and odd numbered residences on odd numbered days. Exterior water usage may occur between 5am and 8am, and 6pm and midnight only. 

The township called for nominations for senior of the year, and the public has spoken! Mary Buie is Billings Township Senior of the Year for 2019! The announcement was made last Friday by His Excellency, Mayor Anderson, in full mayoral regalia (the township staff keep refusing to get him a chain of office, so he had to improvise, but was still terribly impressive). The official ceremony will be held at a later date, to be announced.

Words of wisdom, from a toddler’s perspective, as we continue to enjoy warm weather and long summer days: Scream like no one’s listening; Dance like you’re going to pee your pants; Play like someone else is going to clean up your toys. Have a great week!

July 5, 2019

Shell yeah! It’s summertime, folks! You know what that means… sun’s out, puns out! If you haven’t been feeling it, perhaps all you need is a little vitamin sea.

The Kagawong farmer’s market is in full swing for the summer! Every Wednesday through July and August from 10-3pm you can find homemade treats, local crafts, fresh veg and a lots of other treasures! For vendor opportunities, call 705 210-9924. 

Looking to be swayed by some pier pressure? Tonight (Friday, July 5)! All the cool kids are heading to Providence Bay to see the Kagawong Folk Roots group perform on the boardwalk at 7pm. Be there or be squid. 

Tomorrow! St. John’s Anglican Church is hosting a giant yard sale, bake sale and BBQ on Saturday July 6th. Head down to the market pavillion from 10am-2pm to browse for that perfect item and walk off with a cupcake in one hand and a roast beef on a bun in the other!

What did the water say to the beach? Nothing - it just waved.

Fancy a bit of tennis? Join the Manitoulin Tennis Club for their usual outing on Sunday, July 7 (6:30pm at the courts at MSS in M’Chigeeng) and in honour of Wimbledon, be treated to strawberries and cream! What’s not to LOVE about that? Regular tennis nights run Wednesdays and Sundays at 6:30pm; lessons for any level of player are available for free. All welcome! Search Manitoulin Tennis Club on Facebook for more information.  

Have you been to the library this week? Summer hours are now in effect - you can check out books, board games, magazines, DVDs and more, Tuesday through Saturday from 9 to 5 (closed 12-1 so Emily can have lunch. They have to keep their amazing summer student happy!) The library facelift was a huge success! The board would like to thank all the volunteers who came out Saturday, Sunday and Monday to take down books and shelves, paint, and reassemble everything again. The new paint job looks great, and it’s all thanks to you! 

Now that it’s all spruced up, the library can turn its attention to prepping for the book and bake sale on Wednesday. From 11am to 2pm at the Park Centre, there will be book bargains, baking, and a bbq! If you would like to donate baking for the sale, it can be dropped off at the Park Centre after 10am. If you need an earlier drop off, goodies can be dropped off at the library after 9am. 

Also on the library’s summer agenda is another beach movie! Friday July 19th, brave the waters of Mudge Bay (or stay high and dry with us chickens, well away from the shore) while watching The Meg on the library’s giant outdoor screen.  

Seas the day - Summerfest is coming! Mark July 19-21 on your summer calendar, and stay tuned for more information on the great events happening that weekend!

Looking ahead to August, the Old Mill Heritage Centre is celebrating its 10th anniversary this year. The museum board would like to thank all their supporters with an afternoon BBQ on Saturday, August 24th. Even though it’s barely the start of July, Team Fergmeijer likes to plan our meals well in advance, so we are definitely saving a spot on our calendar for this one!

Life is better in sandals, and that’s one opinion we won’t flip-flop on. Have a great week!